Going to Prom – A Muslim Girl’s Perspective

image by Aniqa Rahman, Jewels by Tassou, and Kaftans by Iman Designs
image by Aniqa Rahman, Jewels by Tassou, and Kaftans by Iman Designs at the VictoriousMe Winter Wonderland event.

I have never been to prom. I have the chance to go to my very last prom, which is coming up, but if you knew me, you’d know I wasn’t up for that.

Why I’ve never attended was partly because it’s expensive, a hassle finding a dress and conflicts with my religion. You could give me a free ticket and dress and I think I would still turn it down. So that makes my religion the prime factor as to influencing my choice.

For me to make the decision of going to prom as a practicing Muslim is a long process.
If I really wanted to go, I’d have to think thoroughly about what I would be getting in to, the type of food that will be served, whether it’s permissible or not, my company and the place and whether it will conflict with my religion.

I was so close to refusing an amazing job offer had they said I wouldn’t have been able to pray during prayer times.
A Muslim is supposed to be aware of the decisions they make and the actions they do. That’s why alcohol isn’t allowed; you can’t make proper decisions when you’re intoxicated.

I just don’t feel it’s right to attend. The way I see it, prom conflicts with a lot of the Islamic practices, like the mixing of guys and girls, the environment and the music.

Honestly, I’m really confused about the ruling of music because I’ve heard different arguments regarding whether it permissible or not, and so my call was to just to stay away from it all together.

You could argue that you would be going with a group of girls and so you wouldn’t really be mixed up with the guys, but that’s your call.
My cousin went to prom with her friends.

image by Aniqa Rahman, dress by Peplum Fashion Shop.
image by Aniqa Rahman, dress by Peplum Fashion Shop at the VictoriousMe Anniversary event.

I really think my upbringing influences my view on prom.
I am sure that if I hadn’t gone to Kenya, where I developed into an individual being that didn’t rely on other people, I would have wanted to go to prom. I guess it’s because I was a people follower. During that time, I didn’t know what to identify myself as; was I Canadian, American, a Somali or Muslim? I didn’t find myself so I followed others who had.

Sometimes the idea of letting loose and doing something extraordinary, such as going to prom, gets to me. Sometimes, I want to be that girl that does things without a care about what other people will think.
Prom gives us the chance to wear beautiful dresses in accordance to the theme, which is interesting, and I would love to wear those dresses anytime but I can’t.

Dresses are another huge hassle on its own – almost all the dresses in the stores are either too short, to tight or see-through.
Once you find a dress that doesn’t possess any of those aforementioned qualities, you can finally concentrate on looking for a design you like, which most often, is not my taste. It’s almost impossible for me to find a dress that meets all the criteria and is something I like and my picky nature doesn’t help.

So going to prom, for me is, really, a bunch of work.
First I would have to confirm if it’s permissible enough to me based on my judgment and that requires research and questioning people with knowledge, then I would have to find a bunch of girls willing to go with me because alone, it is boring.
Before that, though, I would make sure they’re serving food that I can eat. Then I would have to convince myself that the money is worth it and make sure to save up. Finally, I would look for that ‘perfect dress’ which would take me three times longer than the average person.

Prom is way too much for me to handle and an experience I’m willing to live without regret. And that’s my take on prom.

– by Zahra Abdi